Kuch Kuch Hota Hai - The Hidden Plot

We often read articles about hidden plots, secret characters and Easter eggs in Hollywood movies.
There are some plot points in movies that are so well covered up that you will always miss them.
Movies like The Matrix, Primer, Inception etc., the more you see them, the more you realize that you probably did not get it all right the first time.

Ever thought that even Bollywood has been secretly hiding plots, Easter eggs and links to other movies ?  The movie that you probably saw ten times but you never got the actual story because you never expected Bollywood to be that smart. Here is one such hidden plot explained and the movie under observation is none other than the SRK blockbuster "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai". A coming-of-age romance directed by Karan Johar as a debutante. Was it really a love story that we think it was ?
Jaanne ke liye Aaagey Padhein....[just imagine aieeeyaiyaiyahaaaaaa from Gupt playing here]

Here I present to you the secret plot in Kuch Kuch Hota hai that nobody ever got. Thanks to my Paarkhi Nazar and Nirma Super I have it all figured out for you.The plot has a secret link to another Shahrukh Khan movie. 

If you have not seen the movie please stop here because there are spoilers. [Aisa sab bade log likhte hain toh likh diya]

And if you are an ardent fan of the movie, then this might just ruin the movie for you forever.

The other movie that Kuch Kuch Hota hai has a secret link with is Baazigar. Does not make sense ? Keep reading till it does.

The protagonist Rahul in Kuch Kuch hota hai is none other than  the psycho serial killer Ajay from Baazigar. I know you genius people will say.."hey he died in the end". So did the killer in 'I know what you did last Summer' , Jon Snow in GOT and Mihir in KSBKBT. You know how it works.

The guy has no name, he never dies. The statement "Hum ek baar jeete hain..." is the biggest sarcasm in the movie. The movie defies the 'pyaar' and 'shaadi' part of it and secretley the 'life' part as well.

He becomes Ajay then Vikki in Baazigar and now he is Rahul in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. He always follows a pattern. He falls in love with one girl , gets bored with her and kills her. He then finds the next one and most of the time it is Kajol. 

He was a sloppy killer in Baazigar so he learns from his mistakes. The plot of Kuch Kuch Hota hai is nothing but his brilliantly crafted plan well executed.

He loves Kajol aka Anjali but then he is attracted towards the new girl in town, Rani Mukherji aka Tina. He decides to marry her for his father's wealth, exactly what he did in Baazigar. He has had enough protected sex with Tina till he gets bored and does his thing. Rani Mukherji becomes pregnant and is admitted to the hospital. For some reason doctors say that her life is in danger. He takes advantage of the situation and kills her on the hospital bed itself making it all look natural. You can actually see him kill Rani in one of the scenes but you won't realize. It has so cleverly been put there.

Don't believe ? ,check the ones below.

He raises his daughter well, gives her all the love but still makes her feel from time to time that she needs a mother. He cleverly names her Anjali .  He makes sure that the chit she picks in the extempore reads "Maa". It was not a coincidence and this gives him a chance to play his emotional card.

He is the one writing letters on behalf of Tina to their daughter and she thinks they were all written by her mother. I mean come on...how can somebody think so much into the future, Tina was no Oracle. When she is old enough to understand, he mentions in those letters about Anjali (Kajol). 

This was really a give away that it was not Tina but Rahul who wrote those letters else how could Tina be so accurate about everything that happened between Rahul and Anjali although she had not even arrived till that time. How could she be so vivid in her description of everything ?  Even the basketball moves, an entire song lyrics, the jokes...everything in the letter..how ?

Elementary Watson...Elementary !!!

Another point supporting the theory is the timing. Rahul always kept track of Anjali. He knew that she did not get married. How could Tina know that in future, after seven years of her death somebody who is almost her age will not get married. I mean, you have a seven year old child and you expect Anjali to stay unmarried till the time you ask your child to hook her dad up with Anjali ?

But still the question...Why did she wait ? The answer is, RAHUL, the psycho serial killer. Like he kills other people in Baazigar who try to foil his plan, he has been killing everybody who was trying to fall in love or get married to Anjali. But however he fails to kill Salmaan Khan because...Ok, tell me one movie where Salman Khan dies ? [Not the one in which he has AIDS because basically he cannot fight viruses. Perhaps he is planning a remake where he gets an Ant Man suit and kills the virus to survive AIDS.]

Rahul pays bribe to the pundit ji (you know how easy that is) who gives some illogical astrological  (both have logic..**high 5**) reason to delay the wedding. Rahul is the one behind the entire setup of the summer camp. His daughter plays to his tunes and goes to the summer camp and he just follows. 

Everything falls in place and they meet after all these years. He is successful in rekindling the love. He uses nostalgia (basket ball, same old song, the shooting star etc.) as a weapon to make her fall for him ( #YoRahulSoBrilliant).

But then Salmaan comes in to ruin it. Now,  Rahul could have proposed Anjali and it could have ended there as she was already in love with Rahul. But, if you remember what Rahul's philosophy is " Rahul ladkiyon ke peeche nahi bhaagta....ladkiya Rahul ke peeche aati hain". He attends their marriage and uses his acting skills to their best creating a scene that melts Anjali and  Salmaan's heart . Because Bhai was just Being Human. Finally , Rahul get's his second girl in the end completing his pattern.

FINAL SCORE

RAHUL - 1     ::   AUDIENCE+PREM - 0

K...Thx...Sorry...Bye....!!!

Is Jon Snow really dead ? : My Theories

1. Jon Snow will resurrect from fire to reveal he is a Targaryen.

2. Melisandre will do some black magic to bring back Jon Snow.

3. Jon Snow's soul will enter Ghost, and we will have a werewolf story.

4.Ghost will eat Jon Snow's body and Jon Snow will resurrect from it's shit.

5. Jon Snow will get frozen into ice and years later found in an archaeological digging, scientists will create a clone based on his DNA structure. And they will reveal his actual parentage.

6. Taking his last few breaths, John Snow will spin his totem to realize it was all a dream and come out of it to and it will still be summer.

7. It was not an actual death, it was a "Social Experiment" . This guy trusted a small kid, and you will not believe what happened next.

8. Jon Snow is dead, he will be alive next episode, just like Kenny in South Park.

9. Those ancient plastic surgeons of India that Modi claimed did a surgery on Ganesha will transplant Jon Snow's head on Ghost so he will survive as part human part wolf.

10. Since Jon Snow knows nothing, he will not know if he is dead and so he will keep on living.

11. Sudesh Oberoi will take Jon Snow's brain out, keep it in deep freeze and plant it in the next person who will die of brain damage.
Reference:



12. Jon Snow met Abbas-Mastan and planned to fake his death to return in the climax of the series.

13. Manoj Kumar will play the Azad Hind Fauj song and Jon Snow will stand up and start walking.
Reference:

14. Those daggers could not kill Jon Snow as he had removed the "Fuse Conductors" from them before the actual event. (Guess the reference...)

15. Jon Snow is dead, Irfan Khan is coming in for him in the next season.

Bollywood Cliched. Chapter -1 : Love Triangles

Love triangles in bollywood have always been the hot favorite theme.From Sangam to Deewana to Kuch Kuch Hota hai to Cocktail, it has come a long way.
The seventies,eighties and the nineties had a long period of love triangle cliched.
So if you have a love triangle , there will always be that one person who will be without love. Bollywood then had a pretty easy solution for this complex problem, 'Survival of the fittest and elimination of the unfit' .  "Maa Baap aisa paal pos ke bada kiye ladke ko, ladki nahi mila ? chal mar ja...". So it's not about anything that you had ever wished doing in your life, fine you might have a career, a family, duties...don't care, if you are not the one who completes the couple ....YOU DIE !!!!
There were several ways of doing it:
1. God makes sure that since you will be the one not getting the girl/boy, you will be gifted with Cancer or TB.
2. The villain will make sure that he does not kill somebody out of the couple but he removes third point of the triangle reducing it to  a straight line.
3. In case villain is not that smart and aims to shoot one of the couple, the lonely guy has to make sure that he comes in the way and takes the shot.
4. Suicide.
Just think how much the family of that dead person would curse the couple that end up 'Happily ever after'.
I believe Sangam was one of the earliest love triangles which ended in Rajendra kumar shooting himself with a pistol solving the problem. It's like:
"Yaar ye x ka value nahi nikal raha equation mein...kya karu...ok I can shoot myself "


 Sometimes the couple would pay an amazing tribute to the dead person by naming their child after him. I asked my dad why they named me "Rahul" , he said "Coz your grandmother suggested".
What if he would have said "There was this guy who loved your mother and there was a situation because I loved her too, he shot himself, his name was "Rahul "....period....


There is this movie called Ram -Avatar ,  that takes this cliched to another level totally.
It is an epic tale of friendship between two guys Anil Kapoor and Sunny Deol (yes you guessed their names right, Vikas and Paresh...). But, there is Sridevi who both of them love and Sridevi loves Sunny Deol .  So for friendship Sunny Deol decides "Main raaste se hatt jaunga..." and becomes "The Dark Knight" so that Sridevi hates him and marries Anil Kapoor. Now , technically Sunny Deol must die. But here is where the cliched is taken to the next level when Anil Kapoor drinks poison from a bottle that has poison written on it kept on the shelf . Yes it used to be a part of every household at that time. Now the whole blood stream of Anil Kapoor is poisoned. But since he cannot die, Sunny Deol compensates for the twist. He asks the doctors if they can take "All his blood till the last drop" (yes you read it right !!) and transfuse it to Anil Kapoor. And the doctors are like " Ok, ek ko toh marna hi hai..toh tu hi mar ja.... tere ko toh poori Pakistan army bhi nahi maar paati..toh khud se hi mar ja...".  So Sunny Deol dies and Anil Kapoor lives.

Watch This to believe

I really want to know which doctor in the world will allow one person's blood to be totally transferred to another person making sure that the first person is dead. I mean what would they tell his family or the police, death due to excessive blood transfusion ? Sanjay Leela Bhansali made this whole big film on Euthanasia , I guess Hritik Roshan could have easily gone to this doctor, saving the audience from the trauma called Guzarish.

Of course the concept of love triangle evolved further in the 90s. If producers could afford a guest appearance by a famous actor/actress, the climax will make sure the lonely lover does not die but goes home with this new person . So you made a three hour movie about this person risking everything in his life to achieve  his love of life and in the last few seconds, he gives a damn to it and moves on with the girl he just met, In Your face BITCH !!!! Sometimes that new person is even better than the old one. For example I am pretty sure if Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa had a post end credit scene, SRK would be showing a middle finger to Deepak Tijori , "Abey Ch***ye dekh mere ko toh Juhi Chawla mili...tere paas kya hai Suchitra Krishnamoorti...ROFL...".
Salman Khan anyways never needed a substitute love, be it Saajan, Auzaar or Kuch Kuch Hota Hai. He would have been like " Abey main Salman hu, mere ko toh koi bhi mil jayegi...". I believe that's the reason he is still not married.

Now a days, the audience are mature enough, saving the lives of lonely lovers and producers budget on guest appearances. People are now fine with none of the two getting the girl  (Dostana) and to an extent of just everybody dying too (yeah...the next generation audience watch Game of Thrones now so they are ok with death anyways). Perhaps, a love triangle by Anurag Kashyap might just end up in a threesome too, you never know.

Real Paranormal Activity Recorded On Tape

This is something that goes around us, all the time. We keep ignoring it, justifying it with logical reasons. But the truth is, it exists. Yes,there are demons around you that do stuff, this video has proof that might just blow your mind and make you shit scared. People with a weak heart , please DO NOT WATCH !!!

10 songs to watch when you are depressed

1. They always tell Sunny Deol -"You Just keep walking, and we will shoot a dance around you" .




2. If you thought "Tamma Tamma Loge.." was the best P.T. Sanju Baba could do, watch this. Even Shakti Kapoor looks like MJ here.




3. Now this one is a combination of some awesome music,lyrics,choreography and yes....CGI....Definitely the Kill Bill number " Bang Bang.." took inspiration from this one. The song says, please come forward, I wanna bang you.( Bang=Shoot ,you dirty minds) And it is supposed to be a romantic number. Yeah I got it...they wanted a title song perhaps.
 

4. Nothing wrong with the dance or the song. This is actually a utility song which you are supposed to play when you are buying a new phone. If they promise 256k colors or whatever, you have all of them in this song to verify.

5. I know nothing can be more exciting than having a DC and Marvel crossover movie, but guess what...we did it long time back. And this tie up actually makes life easy for both Peter and Clark, now Clark Kent can get Spiderman news for his newspaper and Peter gets to cover Man of Steal.



6.  This is actually an idea that can change the entire education system in India. I think Ronit Roy should have conveyed this message to Smriti Irani when she played his wife in 'Kyuki saas bahu'. Present time,being the HRD minister, she could change the future of India. Actually #AccheDin...



7. Next time you want to ask a girl for a phone number, do not ask, give her your number.
This song was actually the result of the below conversation that happened:
Director: Tere haath me kya hai.
Producer: Cellular Phone, naya aya hai market mein.
Director: Yaar masst hai, yaar isko gaane mein daalte hain , masst lagega. Kal le ke aana. Music director, compose kar koi gaana.
Next Day:
Director: Chal la phone.
Producer: Phone ghar bhool gaya.
Director: Spotboy, office se do reciever ukhaad lao, gaana ban gaya hai toh kar hi lete hain.




8. Some people call it a double meaning song, but the question asked is "What is the other meaning ?" The reason why Anil Kapoor was cast in Mission Impossible was that they realized that if he can agree to do this song, definitely he will agree for that #stupidestRoleEver

9. This one is a Kannada Song. The director came to know that the lyricist has bought Rapidex English Speaking Course so he forced him to write an English song for the movie. The only page the lyricist had read was "How To invite people in English".



10. Now this one is a very simple song explaining the manufacturing process of  Kishmish from Grapes. This is played as the introductory video in the dry fruit manufacturing industries across the country.

Zehar wala Poison....

 

I remember the days in school when we were given a poetic piece and then we were up with the task of understanding it , trying to read between the lines and come up with a page of an answer to a 4 mark question trying to explain the 4 lines.

I just thought that can we actually find meaning in everything ? Did the poet ever put so much of his mind into writing it or is it just we that have made it that way. So I just tried to pick up one of the most meaningless songs ever written, though one of my all time favorites, and tried to dig deep. I know I have made a hole in the shallow bowl and digged almost an oil well right through. The question you would like to ask me after reading this will be the same I  asked myself after writing this...WHY ????

main to raste se ja raha tha main to bhelpuri kha raha tha

main to ladki ghuma raha tha ho, raste se ja raha tha

bhelpuri kha raha tha ladki ghuma raha tha

tujhko mirchi lagi to main kya karu

tujhko mirchi lagi to main kya karu

main to raste se ja rahi thi

main to icecream kha rahi thi

ho, main to naina lada rahi thi

raste se ja rahi thi icecream kha rahi thi

naina lada rahi thi

teri nani mari toh main kya karu

teri nani mari toh main kya karu

The male protagonist all lonely in this monotonous world was walking the path of life. 

He is trying to add some spice to his  life like a bhelpuri. On his way he finds company ,someone beloved who agrees to walk the path with him hand in hand.

But the selfish,conservative society as always ,do not approve of their love, they burn in the fire of  envy as they see them. But he does not care about the society, he does not pay heed to the limits they setup, he does not live by their rules, he gives a damn to their envious attitude.

Another protagonist in the story who is a female also shares her thoughts as she walks the path of life, but she is all alone. Unlike the male protagonists striving to add spice to  life,  she likes it all calm and cold as an icecream.

She makes eye contact with everybody she meets only to find the bitter truth and the fear that lies behind those eyes, the truth called death and the fear of death. But she is devoid of any concerns or any worldly pursuits. She knows, death is a pain only for the living. She has risen over the materialistic world, she has no fears no concerns, and even death does not bother her. Even if somebody very close to her leaves this world, she knows that they have actually attained freedom from the shackles of life, so she is unperturbed by it.

You are a Filmistani...

There are things normal people do...and there are actions Filmistanis do.
There are things normal people think and there is a reel that that rolls inside a Filmistani mind.
There are things normal people say and there are dialogues Filmistanis deliver.
Just watched the movie Filmistan and realized that  many of us have that filmy keeda inside us. So here are a few things we do , say and think. Even if you get a 14/21 welcome to the club...The list is though  never ending..but somehow I tried to pick 21 (for no reason). Add on in the comments...

1. Whenever you want to address people you want to start with "Ramgarh ke Vaasiyon...." or for the newbies..."Hazraat..hazraat..hazraat"

2.Whenever you are playing cards or rather any game and there is this person you know is gonna lose bad, you say "Thakur toh giyooo..."

3.Whenever you pack your bag up...carry it on your back...it plays in your mind "Deewana main chala....usse dhundne..."

4. When you win a game its " Jo jeeta wahi sikandar " in case of a loss "Haar ke jeetne waale ko Bazigar kehte hain"

5. You cannot ride a bicycle without "Woh Sikandar hi...doston...kehlata hai..." playing in your mind.

6.You always stand on the train door thinking that some girl trying to catch the train might need a hand. 

7.Whenever a song starts to play in a club,restaurant,car..anywhere...you are the first one to guess it and that makes you feel awesome.

8.You sometimes hate the fact that there is no awesome movie character on your name. You would have loved to be a Rahul,Raj,Rohit,Karan,Simran,Anjali,Teena...

9.A shooting star reminds you of KKHH and KHKN always and you make a wish.

10.When you walk in a gang...you feel like going robbing a bank. No points for guessing the song :).

11.You have expertise on whistling to the tune of DTPH,KKHH. 

12. You have THAT song you always play when you drink...essentially a Kumar Sanu or Kishor Kumar number...and now possibly Arjit Singh.

13. You so much want a filmy life: a runaway marriage, affairs, a Simran trip, bring down the villains of your life in style, a 'Badtameez Dil' in ur BFFs marriage,3 Idiots interview...the list is endless.

14. You know the Mohnish Behl theory.

15. Your surprised expression is "Ailaa...Juhi Chawla..."

16.Whenever a friend comes back without doing the job he was sent for you say "Kya soch ke aye the...Sardar Khush hoga ?

17. Whenever somebody asks for a permission or a suggestion on "Should I do it ?" you say..." Ja Simran....Jee le apni Zindagi..."

18. Every time you promise you say it...

19. For every sorry and thank you from a friend...you hit it...

20. You think of  'Madan Chopra' each time you take a spin in a chair..

21. This one possibly everybody has on their list...The best way to highlight the incapability of a person in this entire universe is...